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Channel: Random Spillages from a Reportedly Strange Mind » humour
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Short Number 9 (I think)…Catch me if meow can!

The predator came again (yawn) The Hunter, The Stalker, The Trier, The God of the Web Pilferer’s…The Leader of the Western Plates The Wilder-Peast!!! But; where oh where was the prize? “She’s a quick...

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Short Number 10 – The Student got a…‘Ology’!… Really? How un-apt! ;)

Caressed in a Fortress Obsessed, Suppressed, Distressed, Blessed, Depressed Confessed… Stressed, Countless, Boundless, Fearless, Princess 3 years on, she was…An essayed out mess At the end They said...

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Oh My Gaaaawd! An actual AWARD! ;)

Well…would you christmas eve it? I’ve only gone and got an actual AWARD for…. The Bilge that Spills from These ‘ere Hills! I would like to thank Vicki Annison of The Kiwi Blog Bus, for being an...

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If you can’t get a life; At least reach for some thoughts…you ‘Bitter...

As a rule, I’m not a judgy person I have an ability to see two sides of most situations; so when I see someone behaving like a twat, I can normally find some inner mercy for their idiot...

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Short Number 12 – The Exception to the Rule of Gift Exchanges

“I know I said you should always accept gifts graciously darling” “Yes yes, I know I said you should keep them too” “But there’s always one; one exception to the rule” “Always” “Please Mum…Pleeeease”...

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‘Amy and The Mice’– An Alternative Take

Of all the Amy Winehouse footage to cause a wave of disapproval, this video sits up there with best of them In order to see the beauty that I see in this scene, you must first remove the judgements you...

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‘Psychosis is a necessity; for the emotional development of certain...

I think it would be a fair generalisation to say that : – People who suffer from periods of psychosis, tend to be thinkers. Not just in bouts of insanity; but all the time… I’ve just mind meandered...

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Ten Line Tootys! Come play in ze hay ;) Writing Challenge 4 (2012)

I’ve made up a game; as I’m 33 years old I’m gonna call it a writing challenge Please come and play with me; word-pressers of the world The Rules to each TEN LINE TOOTY Choose ten random sentences,...

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Why use words, if you can ‘Ram Raid’ instead?

What is the world coming to? Last night, I was having a little session with Amy and my stereo for about half an hour, I’ll grant you it wasn’t on the quietest volume; but it wasn’t excessively loud!...

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Short Number 13 – It’s my alter ego, silly!

“I’m not crying”    “Yes you are, you’ve been crying for days”    “It’s not me”    “I have another personality you see”    “Meet tap…Leaking tap” “I’ll get you a new washer” “Don’t bother, they all...

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Take everything, Just leave the SHOES… for Betty’s Sake!

Working slap bang in the middle of the city centre is depleting my tiny savings pot, at a ‘rapido’ rate Why? Shoes Shoes Shoes I am obsessed, I have just purchased the cutest pair of shoes I think I’ve...

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“If your partner is ‘Crazy’, run for the hills” (The World, 2012) … How Rude!

I decided to do a little bit of research into my love life a few weeks ago And I typed ‘why am I attracted to crazy people’ into Google. (Please note, I wasn’t presuming I am remotely sane when I typed...

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Littlebeut333 wants to ‘Change The World’…Ohhhh yes she does! ;)

Advice fit for the Butt-hole? Or the Bee’s Knees of The Ball?     I was going to write a short description about my views on changing the world…However, I know how quickly we humans dismiss opinion if...

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Eugenics without murder = Ladette to Lady

For any of you that are not aware of this delightful television program – The general gist is to improve the behaviour of a selection of ‘out of control girls’; via methods that were used in the...

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Short Number 27 – Face Value

On face value Off face value The enjoyable interaction = The enjoyable interaction Except one is underpinned by trust, respect, thoughts, loyalty, kindness, honesty, highs and lows, impact…and these...

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God and ‘Boots the Chemist’ are making me a better person! Together :)

I went insane recently on a level previously unseen by most of mankind, many 3000 word posts can be found in my archives that reflect my utterly doo-la-lee state of mind, should you be interested....

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The Final Chauvinistic Frontier! ;)

What is it about tattoo artists, that seems to make them all soooo bloody moody? I have 3 tattoo’s and the ink from all 3 was injected by a miserable, awkward, temperamental, mildly spoilt and very...

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Excuse Invalid…Coupon expired some time ago!

Ok…I’m throwing out a bit of a generalisation here, and I mean not to offend, but I can’t help but think that some people are using their childhood baggage as an excuse to be an adult asshole, when the...

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The Wind, The Trust, The ability to Thrust! ;)

As the old saying goes… “I wouldn’t trust him as far as I could throw him” I feel a couple of sub-questions should be addressed, before any action is taken… a) Am I physically capable of picking up and...

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Geezer Birds and Camp Alpha Males

I’ve never really been a girly girl on a large-scale. Don’t get me wrong, I adore shoes, I love an excuse to put a spangly dress on, and I probably have more clothes and handbags than Vera Wang herself...

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